A day at the beauty spa(simo neuron!)

5:48:00 PM

Hello darlings,

this happened to me about one and a half months ago but I just found the time to blog about it. It was supposed to be published to an online magazine too but I guess they thought better, lol! I realise the time is not perfect with all that is going on in our country but I really needed to share this regardless.

I wanted this post to be about beauty and relaxation and about pampering ourselves from time to time. Instead this is a post on what can go wrong on a spa center visit and what to avoid when you are a mulish person who knows what she wants!




So, some years ago I joined my sister and some friends to a short trip to Peloponnese. We stayed in a very luxurious hotel which is also known for their spa center. While there, I didn’t resist the temptation and made some appointments to pamper myself. I got a deep facial cleanse, massages and hair treatments and I had a very rewarding experience altogether! It was a great place with calm and polite people, quiet and it was also very private.

I’ve been under some stress lately and I also was in serious need of a deep facial cleanse, so when a friend of mine said she had a coupon for this amazing spa in the center of Athens she was not going to use, I jumped right on it! Oh boy how I wish I hadn’t! 

You see, I kept my previous experience in mind and I expected the new one to be like it. Only it wasn’t! It had absolutely nothing at all in common!

First off I was greeted by a very pleasant receptionist who asked me what I was in for and then asked me to wait in the lobby. As soon as I sat there another pleasant person asked me what I wanted to drink. They even had the green tea I like so this really started out great. I was mentally telling myself to calm, to relax to stop thinking about all those things that were swirling in my mind and to also forget the fact that I was starving since I was (and still am) under another boost of fasting therapy. It was starting to work too. I became more and more relaxed by the minute, the tea was doing a good job telling my brain I am getting food and I was beginning to let it all go and start to enjoy myself.

After a while another immaculate and smiling girl came to me, introduced herself and asked me to join her in her office, as I did. I immediately knew that she wasn’t the one that would give me the facial since her office only had a desk, some chairs and a machine I didn’t recognize at first cause I didn’t look hard. She started asking me what I do for a living, where I live and stuff like that so I assumed she was an administrative employer and that as soon as she was done we would proceed with my treatment. I couldn’t wait to close my eyes and enjoy the quiet and tranquil music I remembered from the other spa!

After some small talk and since I’ve finished my tea, I was getting up from my chair when she asked: What is your ideal weight? I did a double take and said: Emm what’s that got to do with my treatment? She then proceed to tell me that the coupon included a free session with a dietitian -which she was- and that we would talk about my weight and how the spa center was going to help me achieve my ideal weight. I said I didn’t want to talk about my weight because it was a stress factor for me and the purpose of my visit to the spa was to relax and not stress. She acted like she didn’t care or hadn’t heard me. I started to feel that the previous effort to relax was going to waste!

She went on and on about my weight, she almost manhandled me into the machine I told you about which was supposedly so good it could tell you your body fat (bullshit I have a PhD in biochemistry bitch), your indigestion problems (are you freaking kidding me?) and how much “water” your system has been withholding (Yah right!). She smiled politely to all my attempts to put a stop to this torture she was having me go through and then –when I made a mistake to show some interest about a laser treatment for my upper lip hair – she introduced me to yet another immaculate girl to talk to me about their hair removal treatments. 

Well, after spending half an hour with the other person who claimed my face needed two kinds of laser therapy by their plastic surgeon (!!!!) I put a stop on her rant when she said the treatments cost 856 euros. I didn’t hold my mouth and asked her: Are you freaking nuts? She never lost her smile when she said: Oh my, let me see what I can do to reduce this price! Ok, how about 250 euros for the treatments sound?
Emmm, how about NO! NO! NO! NO! I am not that dump, I don’t want the treatments, I just want you to take me to the room for the facial so I can try to relax.

It took another 15 minutes of her trying to cajole me into various other treatments which I supposedly shouldn’t live without and then I was finally led to the treatment room. I took a big breath and thought, at last!




Only the room which I was led to was obviously occupied. A man with a lab coat was doing something with a curious looking machine on a woman lying in something very much like to a gynecological chair. He was actually bent over her open legs – her very naked open legs - and there was a curious noise. I was backtracking to the exit when yet another immaculate girl stopped me and told me to take a seat on another one of these weird looking chairs. I then realized that the room was quite big and that apart from the couple I just told you about there was another woman lying with her underwear on another chair and was getting a massage from…yeap you guessed right! Another freaking immaculate girl!

I will not go on to tell you how I’ve spend the next hour lying on the weird chair (thankfully with all my clothes on and my legs closed), while my face was being cleaned thinking to myself: What if the coupon was for a bikini wax instead? Thank God for small favors!

I left the place after dodging the attempt of another employer of the spa to talk to me about a magnificent offer I should not miss and was able to breathe again only when I was out of the building.

Needless to say I wasn’t relaxed at all! In all honesty the technician who cleaned my face did an ok job about it. However, nothing could be called calm and relaxing about a common room for a spa! I mean ok I haven’t been to a lot of them but someone who’s having her hoo - haa lazered or having a full body massage SHOULD not be in common room for crying out loud! I mean where is the privacy and relaxation in that?

Don’t even get me started about the weight lecture! I know I must loose weight. Hell, everyone knows I should loose weight. I also know these people make their living by selling treatments! I know that! But respecting the customer’s explicit wishes should come before everything else! If they were smart, they would let me have my treatment and relaxation and then give a pamphlet to read or send me an email!

I will never go back to that spa center. I will not recommend it to any of my friends either. Of course with the way things are going right now I will not have money (or even the mood) to go to such a place again, so who cares right? 

Anyhow, my rant is over, I just needed to share this with all you out there who dream about a day in a spa. My advice to you is to do your research before choosing your spa if you want it to be a memorable experience and not in a bad way! Trust the word to mouth marketing on this one girls!


Lot's of love

Akamatra
P.S: If you'd like a professional waxing session but lack the money (or the threshold for pain) you can take part to me giveaway to win your very own professional hair remover.

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